She parties wild, what a wild child!

It’s weird that it’ll be 2009 in less than 24 hours. I should probably have some profound wise speech to make. I read my posts from last year, laughed at myself and thought, “Wow, I sure was a confused little girl.” Which led to me laughing at myself again because I apparently haven’t learned a single thing in the entire past year. I feel like I have, though. I feel like I’ve grown up and learned and lived and experienced. But reading last year’s post, I am still the same girl I was. Just less innocent. It’s ridiculous that I’m in the exact same boat as I was. Why didn’t I expire those relationships that were holding me back? Why didn’t I search until I found myself? Why didn’t I do all of the things I wanted to do? And now that a new year is beginning, all I can do is start over. I’ll make new resolutions, make a list of things I want to start/stop and probably never carry through with any of the plans I make.

But I don’t want to look back on this year’s blog and think the same things I am now. But the problem is..I can’t think of what I need to change. And that’s the real problem. I know I have things that need to be changed, but I am not actually considering what they might be. I know I have to do -something- in the boy department. But I don’t have any way to resolve that, so I’ll save that for later. *sighs* I seriously don’t even know anything anymore. So hey, I’ll write something fun! Some things that have CHANGED this past year!

I had another best friend switch. Jessica Katherine Girod FTW! I lost and regained Jeska. w00t. =] I had my first real kiss and then a million more. I -almost- gave my heart to someone who didn’t deserve me. And then ended up giving it to someone else who didn’t deserve me..even though I’m still convinced he does :] I wore an illegal smile…a lot. :] And yeah…damn. It’s been CRAZY as hell!

So I was sitting in the car tonight listening to Garth Brooks and Nirvana hoping they’d give me some insight for my life and I looked at the clock as it turned 11:11. I decided I’d make the perfect wish..and whenever I had it, I looked at the clock..only to see that it had slipped away. 11:12. What a terrible time.

“And its been a long december and theres reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I cant remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass”