Author: shoesluvsjesuschrist

Hey LOVES….life looks good, good, good..Billy’s got his beer goggles on..LOL! I’m too country, I SWEAR! And im so not listening to country music right now so HA! I did listen to Kenny Chesney yesterday & when I told Aaron he told me I needed to be shot-LOL. Ooh, last nite I had a dream that Danny winked at me in Sunday School!!!! lol <3<3<3 Just because Sam talked about him yesterday, lol. Church was good…then I went to Grandmothers & took a nap. I’ve eaten way too much today….so i’m done eating for this week…lol. Mom’s about to go to a meetin’ and Imma go to church in like an hour n 15 min. If Aaron calls me while i’m at church, he’ll call back, right? Oh well, since i’m done obsessing over him, I don’t have to talk to him EVERY NIGHT, lol. Crazy stuff.

“Futures”

I, I always believed in futures
I hope for better in November
I try the same losing lucky numbers
It could be a cold night for a lifetime
Hey now, you can’t keeping saying endlessly
My darling, how long until this affects me?

Say hello to good times
Trade up for the fast ride
We close our eyes while the nickel and dime take the streets completely

I, I always could count on futures
That things would look up, and they look up
Why is it so hard to find balance
Between living decent and the cold and real
Hey now, what is it you think you see?
My darling, now’s the time to disgaree

Say hello to good times
Trade up for the fast ride
We close our eyes while the nickel and dime take the streets completely

Hey now, the past is told by those who win
My darling, what matters is what hasn’t been
Hey now, we’re wide awake and we’re thinking
My darling, believe your voice can mean something

Say hello to good times
Trade up for the fast ride
We close our eyes while the nickel and dime take the streets completely
We close our eyes while the nickel and dime take the streets completely

Rain, Smurfs & Fairytales, Sleepy, xoxo, hil*

Hey!!! WHATS KICKEN? Not alot here..

Friday was a pretty ok day. I was pissed at Aaron all day..lol. Coach Johnson moved me..lol and I cracked Jessica up..”this book is soooo interesting!” LOL..<3 Then we had an ok peprally! I got to sit with Jessica and be all krunk tho!! hehe..After the peprally, we all went over to the stadium and chilled in the weight room..w00t. And then we sold newspapers and I got newspaper ink junk all over my white shirttt!!! ha. Did Alg 2 & espanol,  Found out I made a 40 on a biology test & argued with Jeff about Aaron…blah blah.

Then I came home & finally went to Sam’s. We just hung out for a while really…..not doin mucho. Listenin to music n all that jazz. AARON CALLLED! hehe…and I talked to him for like 20 minutes..It made me so happy…but it scared me to death. Like, Rach called and was like “aaron just called for you” and i was like OMGGGGG so I called him back, lol. I fell under his spell again…couldnt be mad at him. So we went to bed early and I woke up bout 10 today…visited with Papaw Waymond..went to the grocery store….saw JUSTIN!!!! AWW! went back to the house & hung out with Memaw Carolyn & Papaw Charles…talked about Mrs Barbara-LOL! Sam n Seth had me crackin UP! & Anyway just chilled the rest of the day……….

Daddy picked me up & went to Johnnys…got us some food..came here…ate a cheesestick…got online….then Aaron called!!! WOOHOO! We talked for like an HOUR!! I got to talk to Ethan & Tyler, too! ❤ I was so happy! They were all fighting over random crap…and Aaron was insulting Ethan & saying I said it..and it was so funny. But OMG..my HIM cd won’t play. I’m sooooooo pissed. But Aaron said he’s gonna come see us before school starts bc his grandparents are coming down here to buy groceries?!? (DONT ASK..lol)

I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, no sorry…. I still love you.

Woops now I got quote font.

He asked me if I’d gotten over him yet…I just laughed. Player or no player, I haven’t gotten over him yet….HMMM…James emailed me back & texted me back, YAY! He said St. Marys was soooooo gonna beat us this Friday! lol he said “keep dreamin!” hehe. Well, here you go, i’m ready for all the mean comments about how I shouldnt still talk to Aaron & all….

“Thats a weak excuse” “Yeah, and im weak..”

Rain, Smurfs & Fairytales, Dreamily, xoxo, hil*

No matter how much time goes by, you’re never gonna forget the first time he looked at you & how you fell in love with his eyes.

I’m a Raggedy Ann, in a Barbie world

love doesn`t require you to be perfect;
it just requires you to forgive
 – Boy Meets World

GuEsS Im /D/i/F/f/E/r/E/n/T/
ThAn ThE oLd Me
BuT u NeEd To .A.c.C.e.P.t.
AnD tRy To SeE
ThAt JuSt BeCaUsE
Im NoT LiKe BeFoRe
YoU dOnT HaVe To HaTe Or IgNoRe me
so SoRrY iF iM dIfFeReNt
If Im AcTiN sTrAnGe
BuT LiKe It Or NoT
*P*E*O*P*L*E*C*H*A*N*G*E

Cinderella walked on b r o k e n g l a s s, Sleeping Beauty let a whole lifetime [ pass ] Belle fell in love with a hideous beast. Pocahontas[ r i s k e d ] her life for a feast, Jasmine could have had anyone instead she chose a poor man & Arial walked on land all for love & all for life it was all about blood, sweat & tears, love’s about facing your b i g g e s t  fears.<3

HEH…HEH.

He’s not MY rockstar!!!!!!! He’s every girl in the world’s rockstar!!!!! Because AARON SMITH….IS A PLAYERRRRRRRRR! w00t! lol. Yep, he decided he’d make up crap to tell me…and tell Jessica the same thing & tell us not to tell each other cuz he didnt wanna hurt either of us……ha! He’s a loser…and he’s hilarious…and such an idiot. ❤

Time for sweatpants, icecream, cheesy movies & my girls….Kylie, Kaylin, Sam, Jessica…lol anybody who’s been sad in the last few days……I love my girls!<3

I talked to Jessica til like midnight thirty….and wow, we are some kinda pissed! At least we learned it sooner than later. Im so glad he did it to us and we’re stronger than his crap…<3

Well talk to you later lovers……XOXO, hil*

“Pulling myself away from you might just be the hardest thing that i’ve ever had to do”

I survived without him before, what makes me think  I can’t do it now? I tried to be strong, I did. I’ve tried not to think about it all day…but i’m not strong….im just not. I miss him so much…and i want him to miss me that much. And alot of my friends are upset about stuff right now…things just aren’t good. I’m so sorry you guys….I’m so sorry. It’s all so horrible…..Its just i know things happen to build us up..make us stronger..but like sometimes you just dont see it…like i still dont see it in my situation. You know they say farther along we’ll know all about it…farther along we’ll understand why….but its hard….it’s so hard. I’m crying now…..I think God’s punishing me for not being who I should be…..Im gonna go now…..Pray for me…and my girls. And Aaron.

A Cupfull of Tears, xoxo, hil*

Aaron didn’t call me back last night…I was sad..but i’m ok. I wrote a poem today, you all gotta check it out!!!! ❤ www.xanga.com/ordinaryaintgoodenough

I tried calling Sam a bunch last night…I talked to Jessica on the phone for a while last night which was awesome. We’ve decided we wanna be…hmm..”Hippie drainer ex-sluts who are friends with that dude”…haha. Me & Jessica are awesome.

School….*sigh* First hour was hilarious cuz it always is..Disco Dan the Bowling Man wore a purple shirt. Carl still won’t talk to us. We didn’t get moved though…lol. And I think I did fairly well on that test. We walked in 2nd hour and we weren’t the last ones today!!!! YESSSSSSSS! And we talked about Aaron & them and it made us feel better cuz we got to laugh about memories..I didn’t do crap in Journalism…I have to write a book review tonight, though! Woo-hoo! Mr. Hillman’s class was…eh…ya know. I read during lunch…took a espanol test (did good) and then read..I’m reading The Wind Blows Backwards by the way..I completely FAILED a Biology test..i’m so serious, too. English II test was fine…<3.

I talked to my cousin Amber on the phone earlier! It was so awesome b/c I miss her so much. She was like well if you ever wanna talk…just call me. Awwee. I can play SIMS again!!!! YAAAAAAAAY!

Well I wonder if we’re going to Grandmother’s today but I kinda figure we aren’t so that pretty much SUCKS! It means I can’t talk to my family about Aaron-lol..yep, but i want to. Cuz I won’t be able to talk to him cuz i’m not calling him today and he’s surely not gonna call me. Can’t talk about him though cuz he’s not here to defend himself. I’m trying to make the place where Aaron broke the skin on my arm…a scar. ❤

Well love to JORDAN & DAWN FOR BEING AWESOME! hehe. I’ll talk to you cats lataz….comment! Rain, SMurfs & Fairytales, xoxo, hil*

REMEMBER TO CHECK OUT MY POEM!!!!! hehe.  

*hes gorgous.. but gorgous is an understatement. More like your startled everytime you see him bcuz you notice something new in a “wheres waldo” sorta way. More like you cant stop writing run-on sentences bcuz u cant even remotely begin to describe something or someone so incredibly, inherently a.m.a.z.i.n.g. More like your afraid that if you stare at him too long.. ull prove your friends right.. that y.e.s. your face will get stuck that way…. but you dont miind* <—that reminds me of the book im reading..and the guy in it reminds me of aaron sometimes

GnRoses90: guys are so dumb and insensitive

BlueRainBliss: of course

GnRoses90: all they care about is themselves

This one guy got me a an awesome song….turn up ya volume. “Buried Alive by Love” by HIM. It’s so awesome.

I talked to Toni today!! Aaron started working again today! I’m sooo happy bc he loves his job oh so much! I’m so happy for him. See, i’m so happy that he’s happy that i’m not so unhappy that he hasn’t talked to me. I’m being unselfish!!!!!! But I still miss him so much. But anyway, he’s supposed to go HOME today!!! That also makes me super happy because he gets to go back to his room and his CAR! lol ❤ But Idk when i’ll hear from him…and it upsets me. I miss him so much. I miss Tyler….I didn’t realize how MUCH i missed Tyler until Jessica said “NO, I WANT THEM OFF!” today…and I died laughing. lol He rocks my socks. I did get to hear him say “YOOOOOO” the other nite. And I got to hear Maegan fuss at Aaron which was awesome! hehe. <3!!

Aaron just called, I gotta go. ❤ Rain, Smurfs & Fairytales, xoxo, hil*

Aaron had a bad day….poor thing. His step dad’s in a crappy mood and he’s mad at him…and he had to work all day & his friends aren’t there and some guy he hates is workin with him temporarily. Poor him.

<—Check out the new pic.

Yesterday sucked so much.

I didn’t get to talk to Aaron all day. I don’t even wanna call him today. I called him at 8:30..told his mom to tell him I called. I waited by the phone until 9:45…thats when I fell asleep..woke up at 5:30 and cried cuz he never called.

I woke up this morning and I feel horrible…so horrible. My stomach is killing me…and I’m just so sad…so yeah. I just emailed Sam an extremely long email….now I don’t know what to do. I needa clean my room…but I just feel like sleeping, watching MTV, listening to HIM…sleeping.

Make him call me….make him. I wonder if Jessica has called lately. Can’t ask her though.

Tears, Emo Music & Darkness, xoxo, hil*

 

Hey lovers…..i’m about to leave for school, but I wanted to update since I got two comments from the most awesometastic ppls ever!! ❤ Well hmm..yesterday was great.

I failed an Alg. 2 test. Then I came home and Kylie came over…me & Aaron played phone tag-lol. Neither of us would be able to answer, lol. Anywayz though, I called him at 7:30 and we talked til 8:30..then called him BACK at 9 and we talked til 10:30 or so..<3

My feelings for him scare me….so much. I’ve never felt this way before for ANYBODY. It scares me to death…. He’s all I can think about…..He makes me so happy.

And, he’s gradually letting me know….he feels the same way.

Rain, Smurfs & FAIRYTALES,

                 XOXO, HIL* COMMENTS!

–edit– Nobody’s answering the phone. Aaron’s house: “Can I take a message?” “Uhh..this is Hilary..and uhh..i’ll call back later.” Jessica’s house: “She’s in town with her Grandma.” Kylie’s house: “I’m studying..you should study.” Sam: “I can’t hear you, i’ll call you back later.” Me: “I’m sad..”

I just wanna talk to him, gosh. It’s not so hard, peoples. He’s all I’ve thought about all day. And now they’re gonna make me wait til 8:30 to talk to him..are they CRAZY?

I have a big biology test tomorrow & Algebra 2…and it all sucks majorly. And my book review’s due soon. I think i’m just gonna like….go to sleep.

summer has come and passed
the innocent can never last
wake me up when september ends

 

–edit– I refuse to post until I get comments.

I just got off the phone with Aaron cuz he loves me! hehe.. We talked for 48 minutes. He told me he liked me, hehe. And we talked about his awesome band and him getting a record deal and all that jazz. It was soooo awesome. He said last night was interesting in a new cool kinda way…aww. “I mean, it was small, but it was AWESOME!” <—-awww.

Tyler asked him why he had his arms folded and he told him because his stomach hurt..lol and it’s ok because his stomach DID hurt! So he wasnt completely lying!! haha I cant wait to talk to him tomorrow. Woo-hoo. I’m still sad but i’m 10 times better. Well I gotta go call Kylie, I think. Or Sam. Or Both! I’m so……woohoo, i needa talk to KAYLIN! Well, im out like a fat kid in dodgeball…and I sure do love me some dodgeball.

Rain, Smurfs & Fairytales, xoxo, hil*

http://cphs.caldwell.k12.la.us/Misc/Hil’s%20pics/himm.JPG

“Hilary

       What’s ^? Nothing much other here besides being extremely pissed off. I really dont want to go home tomorrow. I am really gonna miss you and Jessica. Yall are alot cooler than alot of people…….well most of the people in New Orleans. Just do me a favor and stop listening to Fall Out Boy. They’re really bad. Anyway, i’m still gonna call you so we  can keep in touch, I promise. Dang, I miss yall both already and we havent even left yet. The times we had while we were up here were awesome and Im never gonna forget it. Im gonna call you as soon as I can cause we have to talk about something. I just want you to do me a favor and never forget about me. I’ll be back, but while I’m gone, don’t forget me. You have to promise me that, ok! I’m so sorry we have to leave. If I could I swear I would stay but it just cant happen. Well I gotta go. Love always!

PS: Dont forget, WE HAVE TO TALK

                          &

              I’LL BE BACK!

                                                                             Aaron A.K.A Bam *HIM Symbol*”

I went and got that from Jessica today. I cried my eyes out. I miss him so much..and I wonder what we have to talk about-hehehe!! Woo-hoo. I’m going to go sleep with the phone near me..and look at my pictures of us in the mall.

I lost my digital camera or something.

                  “If I wake before I die, rescue me with your smile”

Rain, Smurfs & Fairytales, xoxo, hil*