I don’t even know how to explain how I’ve been feeling for the last month.

I wish I had someone to talk to that wouldn’t tell me what I already know.

I find out tomorrow whether I’m going to have a niece or a nephew!! :] I’m so excited. I hope its a GIRL!

 
Well, it’s almost a new year.

• 

how to be loved by me

don’t lie to me. if there’s something going on, just tell me.
don’t hide anything from me. because whenever i find out, i will be highly upset.
have a joint rolled for me when i get off work. you know i need it.
kiss me when i’m crying. and push the hair out of my face.
sleep with your hand on my side. i love to feel the warmth of your touch.
support me as i support you.
look at me when you’re singing songs about being together.
hold me close. don’t let go.
kiss me unexpectedly.
light my cigarettes.
tie my shoes.
fix my plate. and always know i’ll fix yours.
just love me. as me. doing what i do.
just love me back. 🙂

oh, i love you 🙂
stupid ass.
mother f’n stoners!
pahahaa
randal is making noises with the buttons on this phone.
rodney is walking in circles around the house, it sounds like.
tracy is laying down with autumn.
bobby is high and big chilling in his bed.
diamond is in my bed. asleep.
and my mind won’t stop.

oh geez. it’s so time for a fucking change.
if u can control the situation, do it.
NOW.

we have more tickets to pay
so money is a problem.
alas, diamond is spending the weekend with us
so i’m excited.
i love randal’s sisters. :]
speaking of randal,
he’s snoring right now.
ohmygosh, how did i fall in love with this boy so quickly?
i don’t fall in love.
i rock too fast for love.
how did this happen?
it is the greatest happening in the entire world.
i cannot imagine life without this boy :]
really.

last night,
he thought it was over.
he thought i was going to leave him.
and all i could think about..
was how being away from him would kill me.
i always say if randal goes back to jail, i would kill myself.
but i couldn’t.
because everything i do, i do it for you.
i’d never leave you. EVER.
not if i can help it. :]

what am i without you?
he’s the kumar to my harold. 🙂
except we’re in real love..not man love.

okay, its time for work. haha